Gender (In)Equality?

I am not a feminist because I cannot understand feminism. So what is more equal? When a man offer a hand while we needed or when a man is too scared to offer a hand in case we'll slap them for discrimination?

China got me more confused about gender equality. Whenver I see a couple on a bus, if there is only 1 seat left, the woman always lets the man have it. So this equality of inequality?

Here is a real but very sad story happened in my university:
A girl and a guy were having sex in one of the offices and got taken into video by a random visitor from distance. The random visitor shared the video across internet. Out of sudden, all universities in China knew about this video - hehe...a good promotion for porn stars. Then the girl committed suicide. Why she was so ashamed to death but not the guy?